Minggu, 31 Mei 2009

Indian Chicks Are Liars

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Hot women can be found all over the world, which is great when you're a suave, sexy globetrotter like me. Unfortunately, some of them are kind of insane. Bollywood star Neetu Chandra did a photoshoot with another girl for the Indian magazine, The Man. Now everyone is calling her a lesbian, which she hates so much she became derogatory.
"If there is even an iota of doubt in anyone's mind, let me make it clear once and for all that I am not a lesbo," she said. "We aren't even touching each other's body." (The Times of India)

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Um, unlike your sexy face, pictures don't lie. You're clearly all over her. Because of this, I'm assuming you haven't ever told the truth. Yep, you're a full on "lesbo" all right, or at least you are right here, *tapping forhead*. Mmmhmm.

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Teri Hatcher in a bikini

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Here's Teri Hatcher swimming in Miami and, Jesus Mother of God, I forgot how awesome those things are. It's sort of like finding your favorite blanket you loved as a kid except it's Terri Hatcher's breasts. Also, you didn't have to kidney punch your nephew who wasn't even using it, mom.

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Jumat, 29 Mei 2009

Christina Aguilera still has giant breasts

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Christina Aguilera performed for The Tonight Show last night and her breasts are still awesome which is extremely comforting to this writer. Sort of like when I was a small child and thought there was a monster under my bed until my dad would come in and say it's just his girlfriend hiding from my mom so I should shut up or he'll stab Santa Claus. Ha ha, dads.

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Senin, 25 Mei 2009

Kim Kardashian's bikini butt

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Apparently, some hero out there took my advice and finally snapped a picture of Kim Kardashian's ass in a bikini. I had no idea I had that kind of control over people, so that being said, bring me Mila Kunis and a ham sandwich, puppets! Oh, yeah, and spicy brown mustard. Spicy!

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